The Long-Awaited Murder of an Abomination
by Marfacat
Summary: LIEK HAI IM TWItwi an im LIEK suuuupperreer speshul an purty looolll!1!1!1!1!1!1 red Mai STROY an loze brian cels lol!1!1!1!1!1!1! Njoy!1!1!1!1!1! Watvh me an leggy bae defeet evl an stufs1!1!1!1!1!1!
1. Chapter 1

A/N: SOOO HAI DERE IM HREE 2 BRING U TWITWI WOH IZZ DA BESST OC EVAR!1!1!1! RED MAI STROY BC SHEZ AWSUM1!1!1!1!1!

(TIEM SIKP BROUGHT 2 U bai leggy WOH IZZ Mai baeee loll!XD)

Hai Mai name iz TWI TWI an im awsum!1!1!1!-!1!2! Mai bae izz leeggy cuz hes hawt lol

I am 1/2 fairy godes1/2 efl 1/3 mernaid1/4 hobitt an 1/5valer11!1!1!1!1!1!1!

Mai har es ranbow w/spraklez an itz LIEK sooper sihny1!1!1!1!1!1!1!1!1!/)

Mai i's r LIEK soooo prettttyyyyyyy BC DERE LIEK SOOOOPPERRR SPRAKLEY N CHANGE COOLR DEPNNDN ON MAI MOODS an r blue an red.

My boobz r z-cup awl da bois luvv dem not dat ho awren Orr ewyn lol!1!1!1!1!1!1!1! Im LIEK sooper samrt 2 my mom sed so. Loothen is a hagg compred 2 me lol an Bren iss Mai x lol!1'!1!1!1!1!1!1!1!1!1!

I wuzz in Revindal BC Im 1/2elf an elrnod is Mai papa lol Mai moom iss galadreil lol!1!1!1!1!1!1!1! An den I saw leggy bae!1!1!1!1!1!1!1! 'Leggy!" I sed "twitwi!1!1!1!1!" He sed an we did it hiz donnish device wuzz in my sheth an den erlondcam an sed 'its TIEM 4 da concil' he sed an I went

We has 2 desrtoy the rign eh sed 'ya" I sed 'no I wNt it " bromir sed 'gtfo' I sed 'aw man' he sed an died yay!1!1!1!1!1!1!1!1! 'Who wil goo?" Aksed papa

A/n::: ZOMG CLIFHAGNER LOOLLLLLLLLL I HOP U LIEKED IT O WAT U DID I NO LOOOOLLL!1!1!1!1!1! xD c u next cahpter


	2. Chapter 2

A/N::: SO LIEK HAI!1!1!1!1!1! TIHS IS CAHPTER 21!1!1!1!1!1!1!

(Le TIEM SIKP BROGHT 2 u bai TWI TWI)

So LIEK yaeh I wuz at da council meetin or whatevs an elornd wuz all liek 'woh wnts 2 go?!1!1! An I wuz all LIEK "yeh I will an so wil leggy kins!1!1!1!" 'Zomg its 2 danger 4 a wommen 2 go!1!1!1! "" said bromirs gohst

'Lol shut up begon" I sed an leggy sed 'yeah!" An den we did it in fornt of evry1 BC we r modern lol!1!1!1!1!1!1!1! C look Mai dagters so much hoter den awren lol' sed eldron 'omg dont look!" I sed an ecry1 left lol. Butt den da hobitt's were all like 'im comin 2!1!1!1!1!1!" An da dawrf sdarded slobber in on ever1 an we let ihm cum along BC he wuz annoyin evry1 lol!1!1!1!

So LIEK 2 dais lader we wuz at TEH mountain thingy called crustyass or somethin.

'Omg keep me wram leeggy bae!111!1!1!" I sed " of corse fare maden' he sed BC hes a gentlmen. An den I starte flyin and evry1 wuz all 'whooooaaaaa!1!1!1!1!" An my demon angle poewrs aktivaded an I blue up TEH mountan BC I'm kewl! 'Blagh" sed dwraf dood an I laughed BC he's so stoopid lol!1!1!

"Miss twitwi plz tell uz a stroy!1!1! " sed hobit-chan an I sed 'of corse!1!1!1!1" an I tolded dem a storie of my prettynes lol n den ORKS CAME AN I BRUNED DEM AN EVRY1 wuz al 'kewl!" An den awren wuz dere! An she wuzz all 'quit stealin may bf u ho!1!1!" An I sed no an she tryed stabing me an I kiled her lol!1!1!1! 'Tanks " sed argon lol!1!1!1! Den SARON APERED!1!1!1!

A/n::: ZOMG CLIFHNAGER!1!1!1!1!1!1!1!1!1! Revew plz


	3. Chapter 3

A/n::: SO I C PPL LIAK MAI FIC!1!1!1!1!1! I KNWE U WOOD BC TWITWIS AWESUM!1!1!1!1!1!

(TIEM sikp brat 2 u bai leggy poo!1!1!1!))

SO saruon wuzz al LIEK 'yo r soooo stoopid compraed 2 me lol' 'shut up' I sed an he lookd at me an strtd throwin flamy balls at mah fayce!1!1!1!1!1!1! Mai ranbow har fluttrd liak a leef on teh breeze an I wuzz awl LIEK 'I AM NTO STOOPID UR STOPID!1!1!1!1! An den I slased hizz fayce yay!1!1!1!1!1!1! An he dyed an I stoodd on him an den he blue upp an eoywn apered an stabed me an I dyed oh noes!1!1!1!1!1! Lol

Leggy poo kryed an I let out my lsat elgant breth an dyed!1!1!1!1! Mai gohst wuzz watchin 2 c peeps morn me but tahy fliiped out an tosed Mah bod into mt doom wahahaahhahhaaaaahhhhh!1!1!1!1!1

A/N: WAAAAHAAHAHHAH SO SAAADDDDD REVEW PLZ 4 POR TWITWI IM CRYIN ZOMG IM CRYING SEH DYED!1!1!1!


	4. Chapter 4

A/n::: SO LIEK I NOTISD AWL TEH GR8 COMETNS U WRE LEEVN AN I TOUTER CAHPTER WOOD B A GUD IDEA!1!1!1!1!1!

SO yeh liak leggy an I wr havin TEH smecks wen gandy intruptd an sed 'hey we has 2 go 2 TEH doom volcno an trow TEH rnig in lol" 'o yeh" I sed) an tehn hobit chan sed 'wowww u r soooookewl comin bak form TEH ded " I no' I sed an tuk TEH ringg an used my ANEGL FARY GODESSSSS LUV VAMPIER WINGS 2 flie 2 TEH doom volcano an dropp TEH rnig in an teh valer cam an sed 'wow ur so kewl u wll b 1 of us nwo yay lol!1!1!1""" IM A VALER GYUS!1!1!1!1! An tehn I relyzd somthn: I WUZ PREGGRS lol!1!1!1!1!1!1!

I gvae birte into teh volkano so TEH babby wood b fyrprof lol an se WAS!1!1!1! I nemmed hr SPARKLEY POO DIAMONF ROOBY PURRTY PURTTY SELINNNEEES SERENITY BLOOD RED RAVEN MOON MOON WOLF SPEEKR PARSLTONGE HARRY POTTR DELANEY GARNT PERTY PRREETTTTTTYYYY AW SOMESACE FACE an SHE WUZZZZ BOOOOOOOOOOTTTIIIFFFUUUUUUUUULLLLL!1!1!1!1!1!1' lol a. Se is a valr 2 yay!1!1!1!1!1!1!1!11! Cal hr poopoo 4 short!1!1!-!1!1!1!$:)$;&3'djjrmmbhcnf

MOAR NXET CAHPETR!1!1!1!1!1! Lol yayyyy!1!1!1!1!


	5. Chapter 5

LIEK HAI ZO I GOTT ALOT O REVEWZZ AN I DECDD 2 maik anthr stroy lol!1!1!1!1!11!1!

so yeh I hda a babby an hr nam iss poopoo!1!1!1! Twitwi an poopoo we ryme!1!1!1! So yeh I sowd hr 2 leggy poo an he loked att her an fantd teehee!1!1!1! ZOMG IM SO HAPY" poopoo sed 'ZOMG UR TALkin!1!1!1!' I sed an tehn popoo greeeww onto a tenajer LIEK me yay!1!1!1! Se hadd bootfull bloo I's an ranbow har w/ blnod tippzz an a lovly voce LIEK silk lol an d cupzz tehee lol an tehn we wnet sopping att VIKTORYAS SERCET!1!1!1!1! An leggy hda 2 Cary TEH baggss lol!1!11!1! Gilmi dyed in TEH fyre yaayyyy!1!1!1!1! Arrgon wuzz DERE 2 an he lukked at me an tehn we had TEH smecks Tehee an tehn he told me he likd poopoo an I sed 'u has Mai blessin' an tehy got maried yay!1!1!1!1!1! Hobit chan all movd in wit uzz an wer our adoptd kdzz yay!1!1!1!

REVEW AN ILL POST MOAR!1!1!1!1!


	6. Chapter 6

An:: SO HAI LIEK I SAH MOAR GUD COMENTS AN I MAD MOAR UR WELCUM lol!1!1!1!1!

so LIEK leggy not I wer hasin TEH smecks lol wen poopoo an argon cam in an sed tat tehy wer maryd lol!1!1!1! Yay' I sed an I clappd an leggy claped an TEHN awren wuz DERE!1!1!

'y u steel Mai boifrend?1?1?1?1?!1!1! Se aaksed an I punhecd her lol

SUDNLY SARON APERED AGEN

'i tought I kiled u!" I sed 'hahaha hes on Mai sied were workn 2gehtr now lol" sed arwn o no!1!1!1! Adn tehn tehy stabed me an poopoo o no!11!1!1!1!

sudnly ERU WUZ DERE!1!1!1! "Laik can I go bak 2 lief agen?1" I askd.

"No." He sed an sudnly I wuz WIPD FORM EXICTENCE!1!1!1! Poopo wuz 2

an/: O NO WUT NXET?


	7. Chapter 7

SO YEAh I wuz ded but tehn I cam bak 2 lief AGEN!1!11!1!1!1! An TIHS time i hadd me sum moar wings lol

"WHYYYYY' sed awren 'cuz biotch' I sed an ITS GOIN DOWN!1!1!1! OHHHHH BIOTCH FIET!1!1!1!1! 'Go bae " sed leggy 'imma fukkin kil u if u dont gett rid o her' sauorn sed 2 awren cuz he's mean lol adn tehn EWOYN WUZ DERE WTF

LIEK OMG IMMA HLEP HUR KILLLL U!1!1!" Seh sed o No!1!1!1!1

an/::: ZOMG CLIFFFF HNAGER!1!1!1!1!1! Revew plazz aktually idc


	8. Chapter 8

HAI S GOTT SUM GRET COMENTS YAY!1!1!1!1! LIAK I EEVN GOT COMPARD 2 MAI IMORTL DAT AMZE FIC WOWWWW U GAIS R SO NIEC!1!1!1! Njoy!1!1!1!

so yeh awren wuzz lookin at me an tryn 2 kll me butt se DID 4 REALZ DIS TIEM OMG IM LIEK BENG WIPD FORM EXISTNC-

And finally, _finally_ , we get our long-awaited murder of this abomination!

Thanks so much to this reviewers (except for _you_ , _you know who you are!_ ) who took the time to read this... Stupidity I shat out while bored. Don't worry, she's _really, really_ dead.

If you want, you can read the more serious side I wrote from the point of view of the only four sane entities left in Arda. I really give zero fucks whether or not you liked it, but if you did that's great!


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